Story Summary:
When Theodred's true love comes to Edoras in
mourning, Eomer must deal with his own desires towards her. As her need
for his comfort increases, she must decide what role he will play in
her future. She betrays him with a lie that will change his life
forever but he must forgive her or sacrifice his happiness.
Warning: explicit consensual sex
Chapter Seven
Something to Remember Me By
As Éomer walked into the chambers he had been given at Minas Tirith, he
began to shed his armor with the help of a servant. The filth and
stench of it were affecting his very thoughts. After removing the
offensive armor, he asked the servant to bring food and a bath to him.
While waiting for the servant to return, Éomer walked out onto the
balcony to breathe in the cool air. He let it blow through his hair,
wishing it would chase away the thoughts of the previous days. The
balcony overlooked Pelennor Fields and he almost retched at the sight
below him. The field had not yet been cleared of gruesome remnants of
the battle. The bodies of the enemy littered the land. It disgusted him
that the enemy left their dead, forsaking the proper funeral rites of
their fellow warriors. The carcasses of the Mumakil were scattered over
the field. The large, black form of the dead fell beast was clearly
discernible. He knew the upcoming days and weeks the people of Minas
Tirith would have to burn and cleanse the field of the remains much
like the Rohirrim had done at Helm’s Deep.
The sight of the fell beast brought sorrow to his heart. That one
monster had carried the evil being that took his uncle from him as well
as almost killing Éowyn. If it were not for the bravery of his sister,
the Witch King would have gone on to kill others, perhaps himself.
Éomer felt guilt that Éowyn was at the battle. Perhaps she would not
have been there if she had not felt the need to prove her bravery. He
had taunted her at the encampment at Dunharrow and felt that his
comments about her not being able to go to battle had prompted her to
prove him wrong. He was angry that she disobeyed her king, who had
ordered her to lead the people of Rohan. Her recklessness had almost
gotten her killed. When he saw her lying there, his heart stopped for a
moment unable to believe she was there. He ran to her thinking that she
too had been killed and he had lost everyone in his family. As he held
her delicate body, assuring that she still lived, he was reminded of
the little girl that had trailed along behind he and Theodred
preferring to do and learn what boys are taught. She was a fair and
delicate beauty with the heart of a warrior. While he was angry with
her for putting herself in such much danger, he admired her bravery.
Éomer was now King of Rohan but it was not a position he neither wanted
nor enjoyed. Theoden and Theodred had to die for Éomer to become king
and he would gladly have stayed the Third Marshall of the Mark, if they
could live again. He would be a stable boy to have them back.
The victory at Pelennor Fields had cost him much and the victory at the
Black Gates did not fill the hole in his heart. He watched as the
Rohirrim and Gondorians together celebrated on the field of battle
before the Black Gates and continue to celebrate in the streets below
him. The weight of the dead and the sorrow in his heart prevented him
from feeling any reason to celebrate.
Éomer’s thoughts strayed to Amrun as they had so many times since he
left her. He had worried many times about her safety traveling to
Rivendell. He did not know if she was even safe within the Elven
village with orcs running freely across the land. Aragorn had assured
him that Elrond would keep her safe.
Amrun was the only thing he could think of that did not cause him pain.
She was untouched by the battles of the previous days. He longed for
her to comfort him. He had planned to send men to Rivendell for her
tomorrow. Deciding he could not wait the extra time for her to arrive,
he would go with the men as well. He needed her now more than ever.
Éowyn had almost recovered and would be safe in Minas Tirith during the
time it would take for him to go to Rivendell and back. Since she had
also caught the eye of a young captain of Gondor, she would probably
welcome Éomer’s departure for a time. Éomer was not happy that the
White Lady of Rohan would even think to leave Rohan for Gondor.
Therefore he was not happy to find that his sister had spent most of
her time in the House of Healing with Faramir of Gondor, nor was he
pleased seeing the effect this man had on his sister.
In Éomer’s mind, Éowyn was too precious to willingly give her up to
this man of Gondor. Not only did the Rohirrim need her in Rohan, he did
as well. He lost his uncle and his cousin. He was not ready to lose his
sister, his only remaining family, as well. Amrun would ease the pain
of his loss.
Smiling slightly, Éomer imagined the surprise his sister would feel at
his intended bride. It mattered not that she was an elf. He would make
Amrun his wife and soon, now that he could claim her and they could be
together at last. He had never known love before she won his heart in
the forests of Rohan. And now he would claim her as his bride so they
could at last be together without doubt or fears.
Hearing a knock at the door, Éomer moved inside to bathe and eat. After
the tub and dishes had been removed, he went back to the balcony
looking at the night sky. He had planned to go see Éowyn again tonight
but it had grown too late. He would see her before he left for
Rivendell tomorrow. Once again, there was a knock at his door.
When he opened the door, one of the Rohirrim servants that had traveled
with him from Edoras bowed his head quickly then handed Éomer a sealed
parchment.
“My king, I was asked at the encampment at Dunharrow to make sure that
you received this upon the defeat of the enemy.” The man spoke quickly.
“Who has given this to you?” Éomer asked curiously.
“My lord, it was an elven lady. I do not know her name.” The man seemed timid and apologetic.
Smiling, Éomer said, “My thanks for your services.”
Once again, the man bowed and left quickly. Éomer was unfamiliar with
the way people now treated him. Looking down at the parchment, he
closed the door. Curious, he sat on the bed with his back against the
headboard. Reaching over, he poured a glass of wine before he opened it.
Dearest Éomer,
As I write this you are heading to war against Mordor and I pray for
your safety. If Sauron fears anyone, it should be the armies that will
soon face him for there are none more valiant. I know that you will
lead your men to triumph over the Dark Lord with bravery and honor. I
pray this letter has found you and that you are safe and well.
What I must say now requires bravery of a different nature. I am shamed
to admit I did not have the courage to face you and say what I must. I
fear that I have not words to speak that will not cause you pain. My
greatest wish is to spare your suffering. I promised you one night and
that is all I can give. I know that you want more from me but it will
never be. You are destined to be the King of Rohan. I am just a simple
elf. Future kings marry princesses and ladies and these unions form
alliances that unite kingdoms and great bloodlines for the honor of
Rohan. I am neither Lady nor Princess and I bring no honor or gain to
our union. I cannot let you do anything that will compromise your
destiny and I do not wish to interfere with what is best for the
kingdom of Rohan.
This may come as a shock to you after what we have shared but please
know I am only doing what is best for you and your future. Your destiny
does not involve me nor am I the one you are intended to be with. Last
night we were in a dream world and nothing else mattered but the two of
us. In the harsh light of day, things are clearer to me, painfully
clear.
I will never forget you or what last night meant to me. You will always
have a special place in my heart and I do not regret one moment we had
together. Forever, we will always have one night. Please let that be
enough and do not dwell on what could have been.
Remember Me Fondly,
Amrun
Éomer read the letter then read it a second time as if it was in
another language that he could not comprehend. Once the words sunk in,
coldness filled his very blood. Cursing beneath his breath, he threw
the nearby wine bottle across the room. When it hit the wall it
shattered into a million pieces, much like his heart. He watched the
red wine running down the wall to puddle on the floor with a detached
sense of sorrow.
How could she leave him now? After finally allowing herself to admit
her feelings for him, how could she shut him out? She had begged him to
come back to her, now she told him to stay away. She felt his destiny
was to be the king of Rohan and to have a proper wife, not an elleth
who would bring no lands or armies to the marriage, as would a woman of
a better station. He could not believe that she honestly thought that
mattered to him. Even if his uncle were still alive, he would not
protest this marriage due to his own feelings for Amrun.
Éomer strode to the balcony and tried to fight the overwhelming sense
of sorrow. He rested his arms on the railing, hung his head down as he
closed his eyes. All he could think of was Amrun and he felt sick with
loss. Hearing a knock on the door, he thought of not answering it. When
the knock was louder the second time, he stormed through the room and
threw the door open angrily. Aragorn looked surprised when he saw
Éomer’s furious face. Taking a deep breath, Éomer tried to temper his
look.
“Éomer, I came to see if there was anything you needed. I know how hard
it has been for you with the loss of your uncle and Éowyn’s injuries.”
Aragorn studied Éomer and saw that fury was simmering very close to the
brink.
“I am well. I will be fine.” Éomer said quickly in a way that did not allow for much questioning.
“Perhaps, you would like to join us all in one of the dining rooms. We
have gathered there for a less public celebration.” Aragorn suggested.
“No, I…” Éomer hesitated, knowing if he stayed in this room he would
not be able to escape his thoughts of her. As king, he should take part
in the celebration. “Yes. I will join you.”
Éomer was quiet and Aragorn said very little as well. When they arrived
in the dining room, Éomer watched, detached, as those around him
celebrated. He drank more ale than he should have, unknowingly observed
by a concerned Aragorn. After a while Éomer bid his farewell and
started walking to his chambers. Deciding to take a longer walk, he
walked through the courtyard. Standing in the night air, he tried to
clear the fog in his brain from the ale.
“Greetings.” A voice from behind him said.
Éomer turned to see a woman he did not know.
“Greetings.” Éomer replied.
“It is a beautiful night, is it not?” The woman replied her eyes gazing over his body.
Éomer noticed the way she was looking at him seductively and was
surprised that woman would be so bold when meeting a man the first time.
“I am Arianna.” She said with a smile. “You must be Éomer, King of Rohan.”
“Yes, I am.” Éomer said, turning away realizing why she seemed so forward with him.
After a few minutes of an uncomfortable silence, he turned to her.
“Forgive me, I am going to my chambers now to retire. Enjoy the night,
Arianna.” Éomer gave a slight glance at her as be began to walk away.
“Would you like some company?” Arianna asked, enticingly.
Éomer stopped short. Normally he would never had considered her
proposal but he did not want to go back to his chambers to be alone
with his thoughts of Amrun. Turning slowly, he studied this Arianna.
She was as different from Amrun as possible. She was tall with blond
hair and blue eyes. As he was studying her, contemplating her proposal,
she sauntered over to him. Taking her arm possessively, he led her back
to his chambers without another word.
For a week, Éomer spent the warm spring nights with Arianna. Every
night, he would try to forget Amrun, but Arianna’s differences did not
soothe his heart as he had hoped. He found himself constantly comparing
the two women and Arianna was always lacking. Finally, he stopped
allowing her to make her nightly visits and took no other woman to his
bed. He felt it was unfair to encourage women to believe he was
interested in any commitment. No one could make him forget the woman he
truly loved.
~*~
Amrun was lying on the soft green grass looking at the cloudless sky.
Huge tears fell on her cheeks when Elrohir came upon her. Watching her
for a few moments, he contemplated whether he should go to her. She was
a beautiful yet solitary elleth who had never opened up to the Imladris
elves. Lord Elrond had attempted to integrate her but, seeming so
troubled, she shyly kept her distance. Elrohir wondered if she had seen
too much in the world of Men to fully recover.
When news came from Gondor that Sauron had been defeated, the Ring was
destroyed, and Aragorn was at last king, he saw her smile for the first
time. Elrond told her the news of King Theoden’s death and she wept.
Still full of sorrow, she asked the fate of his niece and nephew, Éowyn
and Éomer. Elrond told her that they were both well and the sense of
relief washed over her was visible. Even through her mask of emotions,
Elrohir noticed deep pain in her eyes when she spoke of the Rohirrim
and he wondered if she perhaps missed Rohan.
Elrohir struggled with his thoughts of going to her but when she
covered her face with her hands and openly sobbed, her distress
overwhelmed his reluctance. Knowing she needed, but would not seek
comfort, he walked to her.
“Amrun?” Elrohir said softly. “Are you well?” With her hands still hiding her face, Amrun shook her head and wept even more.
“May I help you in some manner?” Once again, she shook her head.
Elrohir reached out and gently took her hands away from her face as he
helped her sit up. Pulling her to sit on a nearby bench, he took her
gently in his arms, letting let her sob while he stroked her back.
Finally her tears subsided and he looked upon her face.
“Do you wish to speak of what is troubling you?” When Amrun paused,
Elrohir said, “You need counsel and you are close to no other. I can be
a friend to you if you need me.”
Amrun nodded and he waited. Finally, she whispered, “I am with child.”
Elrohir asked, “And this distresses you?”
Amrun nodded her head sadly.
Quietly, he said, “Amrun, if I am to help you, I need you to speak to me of what has happened.”
“It was only supposed to be one night.” She whispered. “It was
beautiful and loving but it was supposed to only be one night. Now I am
to have his child, it will always be more. But he will never forgive me
now. I do not know what I was thinking.”
After a few moments of contemplating what she meant, Elrohir finally asked, “Does the child’s father know?”
“No.” Amrun finally looked at him, her eyes full of tears. “Elrohir,
what am I to do? My child’s father is the King of Rohan. The night
before he left to go to Minas Tirith, I did not want him to be alone
before he went into battle. The next morning, I left him a letter to be
given to him after the battle. I explained to him why I was leaving and
that I could never be with a mortal. Nor could he be with an elf as he
was heir to the throne of Rohan. Then I left him and came here. Now I
am with child. His child.” Pulling back, Amrun put her hand on her
stomach and he could see the very slight swell to it.
“Are you sure he is the father?” Elrohir asked, without thinking.
Amrun looked at him with horror. “I have only been with one man.”
“Forgive me. I did not realize that you had never been lovers with his cousin. I misunderstood, I thought he was your love.”
“This sounds so dreadful. I loved Theodred yet we were never intimate.
Then I made love to his cousin, intending to leave him and now I find
out I am to have his child. I feel so horrible and I do not know what I
am to do.” Amrun began to cry again overwhelmed with her fear and
sorrow.
“Amrun, I am not passing judgment on you. I wish to understand what has
happened. You were comforting him before a battle, which is an intense
time for any warrior. He does not know if he is going to live, so he
seeks comfort with someone who reminds him why he is fighting.” Finally
he looked at her curiously, “Do you not love him? Do you not want his
child?”
“Yes, I love him.” Amrun said, looking down feeling as if her heart was
breaking. “I wish to someday have a child. Elrohir, our love can never
be: a simple elf and the King of Rohan. He would not want an elf for a
wife nor a child conceived out of wedlock.”
“Maybe you are so quick to judge him perhaps unfairly. Does he love you?”
“Yes, he does,” Amrun said with a slight but sad smile.
“You are carrying the child of a man you love who loves you in return
yet this upsets you. You feel as the King of Rohan that he does not
deserve the right to be a father to your child, his child. You are
judging all of this based on the fact he is the King of Rohan.” Elrohir
said, frustrated. “I feel strongly that you have to tell him. It is his
right to know.”
“What about my feelings?” Amrun asked, angry. “Why should I have to
allow myself to be hurt and face rejection because of his right to know
of his child? Sometimes love is not enough and he might reject our
child and me. I cannot live with that. I cannot open myself up to that
hurt. ”
“But you have not told me of anything that makes me think he would hurt or reject you.” Elrohir insisted.
After a moment, Amrun sighed and said sadly, “You will never
understand. It is not your decision to make. It is mine. I trust you
will keep this between us and speak of it to no one.” Elrohir nodded
and grabbed her hand.
”Amrun, you do not have to go through this alone. If you will not tell
anyone whose child this is, at least let me be there for you.” Elrohir
said to her softly.
Amrun nodded, pleased that she had finally made a connection with
someone there other than Elrond. Although accustomed to it, she was
tired of being alone. She smiled and squeezed his hand, grateful that
he was so caring to her. She then went back to her quarters.
As the months moved on, her stomach began to swell rapidly. Her
friendship with Elrohir set many tongues wagging within the city as
people assumed it was his child. Elladan reached out to her as well and
she and the brothers got along well and soon spent much time together
developing a bond of friendship that helped Amrun through her pregnancy.
When they left for the coronation and the wedding of Arwen and Elessar,
Amrun sent her best wishes to the king whom she remembered fondly for
being so kind to her. Although he wanted to be at the wedding of his
best friend and his only sister, Elrohir was torn leaving her behind
alone and pregnant. Amrun insisted he go, knowing how much he would
miss and that was important to him. She also felt he needed to be there
for his father who would be seeing Arwen for the last time.
While in Minas Tirith, Elrohir sought out the young King of Rohan and made idle conversation with him.
Finally, Elrohir said, “So you must know Amrun. She lives in Imladris with us. I know she was from Rohan and knew King Theoden.”
Elrohir saw the pain cross the other man’s face as he said, “Yes, I know her.”
After a moment, Éomer asked, “How is she?”
“She is well. She is beginning to be more comfortable within the city. It has been hard for her these last few months though.”
Elrohir looked for a way to allude to the fact he was to have a child
soon without breaking Amrun’s confidence. He then opened his mouth to
say more. At the same time, Éowyn and Faramir came upon the two. As
Éomer introduced them both to Elrohir, Elrohir knew that his
opportunity to talk to the King of Rohan had passed. Other than to
betray Amrun and tell him directly, he could say no more to Éomer.